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Hope

December 25, 2015 Leave a comment

Boston002“Hope springs eternal.”

I think that one can arrive at the end of hope, yet usually I find myself drifting into that warm mixture of fantasy and desire:  “hope.”  While pleasant and for the most part harmless, it is important to remember that hope looks to the future.  While we can to some extent influence the future, we cannot truly control outcomes.  They will happen as they will, and not, perhaps, as we envisioned them in our hopes.  Hence the statement, “His hopes were dashed.”  We know this does not mean hyphenated; it means dashed to pieces like a ship on the rocks.  So, logically, no hopes, no dashing.

Because hopes focus on the future, while we are hoping we are missing the present.  Since one’s life can only occur now, this is a loss.  When one spends time hoping they sacrifice moments of their life.  They are not here/now, they are there/then in some place that is not yet and may never be.

My teacher tells me that trust is better than hope and I agree.  “Trust the outcome” is the saying.  It is closely akin to the saying, “The Lord will provide.”  Both express the belief in a benevolent Higher Power, whether one calls that power “God”, “Allah”, “Jesus” or “The Universe.”  I have observed that people who express this belief usually find that their trust becomes truth – that the future that arrives is the best possible outcome, and exactly what the individual needs at the time.

In trusting the outcome we put aside our concern for it and waste no more of the precious present moment thinking of it.  Trust that the best will be and leave it to unfold on its own.

How does that work when we are making something happen?  We schedule the tasks that will lead us to our goal and do them in order, step by step, concentrating on each step as we take it.  Fully present and unburdened of our fear that our efforts will be in vain, the steps themselves become accomplishments and stand alone in our memory as individual and significant successes.  Then in the end, if the outcome is something other than you intended, you may be disappointed, but you still have all of these successes behind you.  You can value the memories of your efforts instead of dismissing them as part of a failure.

I recently experienced this as my plans to record some of my music imploded rather spectacularly a few days before the recording session because of a faithless friend.  Looking back, we made some excellent music in our rehearsal sessions.  Instead of a lack of successful recordings I am instead left with an abundance of ideas and learning.

I will make plans – and I will doubtless have hopes, but I will trust the outcome.  I find that it is really true that the journey is much more important then the destination.  So let’s go.  🙂

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Ashes

December 11, 2015 Leave a comment

cloud

After witnessing the rather explosive collapse of The Rubenoff Project for 2015, and a subsequent scurrying after fragments in futile attempts to salvage something, I am left now to finish out the year reflecting on this failure and what I can learn from it.   This betrayal by a friend could not have been better timed to effect the complete annihilation of all my plans.   I have explored all the possibilities and have found there is no where to turn now.  I must accept defeat and move on.

I must turn my attention to travel plans and other concerns, and I will resume creating poems and songs in a quiet way during my brief snatches of free time.  I hope to perform a duo at an open mic soon.  Perhaps I’ll make some computer renditions of the tunes I would have recorded with my friends.  I’ll keep you posted.

Now that The Project is no more it is time to be on to the next thing; time to heal, and eventually to find a way to rise from this ashes and fly again.

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